remember when…

That word, remember. Such a simple one, yet it holds so much power over us. It can take you back to a beautiful moment, or it can make you feel as low as you once did (and hoped never to again). That’s the power of the human brain. For me, memories are sacred. They have made me who I am, which is a sentimental, (arguably overly) nostalgic 22 year old. Why not romanticize our own lives? It is literally our life. We are the main character in our experience of this world. This perspective can be dangerous though. If we aren’t careful, we may begin to change our entire perception of past events, letting these feelings bleed into our present day consciousness. I’m guilty of this. I want everything to mean something. I assume we all do, whether we know it or not. Meaning is what we’re all searching for. A sign, a single moment where everything clicks. This is who I am. This is why things turned out this way. Everything did happen for a reason. In a way, everything does. If it means something to you, then it meant something.

Sometimes it is hard for me to reflect on things until they are over. It’s like I can detach from my own life until suddenly, things change and I sift through memories, events, interactions trying to understand why these things have changed. Maybe it’s the Aquarius in me, this ability to detach. Or maybe we all do it, consciously or subconsciously. For me it is often subconsciously. Days, weeks, months will go by and then one day I look around me and everything is so different than what feels familiar. This can also be dangerous. It makes me sad sometimes, or at least it did for what feels like a very long time. My world evolves with each passing season (whether I want it to or not), inevitably evolving, and it is my decision to evolve with it or to remain in some past life.

My new mantra recently has been: “what is meant to be, will be”. Another simple, yet tremendously powerful phrase. If it was meant for me, than I would have it. There is a reason why the thing I wanted so badly to work out, didn’t. I’m beginning to understand this. It takes away the blame, the guilt that so many of us anxious souls grapple with on a daily basis. It has helped to bring me back from a past-life, to the present moment. Incidentally, it has also sparked an evolution within me. I am evolving with the seasons, or at least I am beginning to welcome this concept.

So I leave you with this: romanticize your life. Believe everything is a sign. Savor your daily rituals (your morning coffee, watering your plants, journaling, a long walk, spending time with your favorite album, taking yourself out for a nice drive), because they are a part of you. My most recent sign has been the concept of a spiritual awakening. I have been hearing more and more about this. It began with finding a book at Barnes and Noble a couple weeks ago, a book on connecting to your higher self. The next week, I heard about it on a podcast. Then it popped up on my twitter feed. I could choose to see these seemingly random events as meaningless. Instead, I embraced this concept. I can leave behind my old path and begin on a new one. I have that choice, and it is extremely freeing. I’m evolving, and that is okay, necessary even. Try this. You will be surprised at the revelations that simply come to you in the process.

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